My man used to ask me why our gay friends always wanted to hang out at gay bars. After all, we don’t always want to hang out at straight bars. They should live a little, mix it up, you know?

The reason was obvious to me. People want to hang out where they can be comfortable being themselves. And Gogol Ganguli’s parents in The Namesake want to hang out with other Bengali people because there is comfort in sameness. Strangers in a strange land, they cling to home by flocking together.

One of my best friends is from China, and she doesn’t understand her Chinese friends and their need to hang out with only other Chinese people. As far as she’s concerned being from China is just a granfalloon (see Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut).

On the surface my friends all look very different. But despite age, race, religion, nationality and sexual orientation, we are the same in crucial ways. We flock together because we can see that sameness, beyond, above and beneath the surface.

I love you guys!

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 29th, 2006 at 9:09 pm and is filed under India, US and Canada, sweetness. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.